Monday, March 12, 2012

Spring run

Ran an easy 2.5 miles today, in the weather everyone is talking about. The two weeks or so I took off due to my GI stuff took a toll. I started taking Entocort, a steroid (another one, yeah), to see if it helped. It did. Which is good except that that means the issue is probably autoimmune...Crohn's, likely, but who knows. I'm just happy to have relief and hope it lasts. I was so wiped out...RA has nothing on this. I would come home from school feeling awful and just being exhausted. Gym? No chance. On the rare days when I felt ok, that's the only time I really believed how bad it was on the bad days. The good days, I wanted to go to the gym...so I knew it wasn't just laziness. Anyway...just one more thing.

Bloodwork and ultrasound today...about 6 little follicles, same as last time. They are small...but I've only been on Follisitim and Menopur for 2 night so far, and I guess I really have no idea what the Clomid was supposed to do. I don't go back til Thursday which is nice. I add in Ganirelix today til the end, which seems strange to me given how small they all are (there is one bigger one...maybe it's for that?), but I'm not overthinking it. Just doing what I'm told.

It hit me today on the drive back to work, most things in life, you work hard and learn and try your best and good things come a a result. This is one of the only things ever that I feel like I have no control over. That's hard.

3 comments:

Nitsirk said...

Glad you are feeling better and made it outside for a run. This weather does wonders for mental health :) I agree completely about stuff you can't control. That's something I really struggle with. My 3 year old is one of those things. We are engaged in a battle of wills over potty training and it is making me crazy.

Angela and David said...

Glad you got a good run in! And the hardest part of infertility is that it follows none of the patterns we know. It has nothing to do with working hard, being a good person, etc. it is just crap luck. I hope your luck gets better!

RunningMama said...

I will confess that I came up with excel spreadsheets to try and understand the estrogen levels, number of follicles, and medicine amounts from all my cycles...and in the end...there was no rhyme or reason to the cycles. Each of the 4 fresh cycles I did were all different. By the last cycle, I just gave up. WHATEVER. Because you are right...you can't control this at all. It is what it is.