Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Long time. Off this week for February break and expected good things in terms f working out but... Something always comes up. This time it was an RA flare in my neck and two toe joints. So yeah no running. It was better today, no prednisone or Vicodin but I still didn't make it to work out. I have had some good runs lately including a 5.5 miler that felt great although a repeat hasn't been attempted. I picked up some old issues of Runner's World trying to get inspiration back. Eh... Not yet. I do understand that there's a lot going on for me right now and am generally way more understanding of myself than i used I be with less of the guilt that I am just being a slacker. That is largely due to accepting that I am one though. I just don't have the focus or goals I used to and apparently don't want them that badly. That does make me sad.

In IVF news I got my period after a 42 day cycle and tentatively have my endometrial biopsy March 6. Then I would start stims that cycle mid march.

I got neck X-rays yesterday. My rheumatologist wanted them in June but I put it off because I didn't want anyone bad news and I didn't want to be in any more doctors' offices. Assume they will call me with results this week. Don't expect anything bad but I know it will show erosions. All the crunching I hear is the same I had in my wrists and ankle and they are damaged so.... No surprises but I guess good to have a baseline.


jsmarslender said...

Today I was thinking about goals I have and realized the ones I have are still rather floaty, not clear - I'm a little afraid of saying them out loud. And few of my goals ever have to to with running. Unless keep running counts, I guess. Anyway, I think it's fine to have some goal-less time. You'll bump into what you want to pursue next.

RunningMama said...

I, too, have no goals. I'm waiting for life to let me know what they are going to be. Are we going to do IVF again? If yes, then no training. If no...do I care? Do I want to train? Honestly, though, your post reminds me that the ability to be active is a gift and as much as I am beating myself up for the changes that have happened because of this last pregnancy...I can still feel strong. So, thanks for the perspective. Also, I found that IVF really f'd up my cycles. I would frequently have a REALLY long cycle after failed IVF. Good luck in March. Ug.It's a terrible waiting process with unknown rewards. I don't blame you for living in limbo land.

Nitsirk said...

No goals here either. Well, I guess the goal is just to keep moving and try to stay fit. Exercise has become more about having some "me" time than any kind of improvement.