Thursday, June 12, 2008

Still normal

I was spinning yesterday and in class was a woman who used to go to the boot camp class I take. When I asked where she'd been, she said she was pregnant. "Me too!" I said (I forgot the "Congratulations" part til later), and she said "And you still go to THAT class?" Well, yeah. She's older, a month further along, with her second, and I guess her doctor told her no jumping. Hmmm. Well, maybe there are reasons for her, but I'm jumping away until it doesn't feel good anymore.

With a week or so to go until the official end of the first trimester, I've been pleasantly surprised at how normal things seem. Normal in that I don't feel or look "pregnant." I think we (or at least I) have always been fed the messages like "Pregnant women get fat," "Pregnant women get nauseous," "Pregnant women shouldn't lift heavy things," and basically "Your life is over, accept it." I suppose, not having any real frame of reference, I bought into that. And yet, when I really stop and think about the pregnant women I have known, the nausea wasn't an issue for many, those who started out thin stayed thin, those who started out fat stayed fat, and there are plenty of pregnant women lifting and running. Like anything, I guess it is what you make it. I wish I hadn't been so worried, and I wish I wasn't currently so worried about what's still to come. It's just the unknown and the not being totally in control that I don't like. And I guess you just live in your reality and accept it.

I should have more faith in myself. It's very rare that I've ever been unhappy with anything in my life, and when I have been, I've found a way to change it or make it better. And I really am excited to see the kid...

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